[blwall1416]

Women's Accessories:

NORTH: Chap Stick in back pocket and a $20 bill in the front pocket.

SOUTH: Louis Vuitton duffel with two lipsticks, waterproof mascara, and a fifth of bourbon. Money not necessary - that's what dates are for.



Stadium Size:

NORTH: College football stadiums hold 20,000 people.

SOUTH: High school football stadiums hold 20,000 people.



Fathers:

NORTH: Expect their daughters to understand Sylvia Plath.

SOUTH: Expect their daughters to understand pass interference.



Campus Decor:

NORTH: Statues of founding fathers.

SOUTH: Statues of Heisman trophy winners.



Homecoming Queen:

NORTH: Also a physics major.

SOUTH: Also Miss America.



Heroes:

NORTH: Rudy Giuliani

SOUTH: Archie & Peyton Manning



Getting Tickets:

NORTH: 5 days before the game you walk into the ticket office on campus.

SOUTH: 5 months before the game you walk into the ticket office on campus, make a large financial contribution and put name on a waiting list for tickets.



Friday Classes After a Thursday Night Game:

NORTH: Students and teachers not sure they're going to the game, because they have classes on Friday.

SOUTH: Teachers cancel Friday classes because even they won't be awake in time to actually make it to class.



Parking:

NORTH: An hour before game time, the University opens the campus for game parking.

SOUTH: RVs sporting their school flags begin arriving on Wednesday for the weekend festivities. The really faithful arrive on Tuesday.



Game Day:

NORTH: A few students party in the dorm and watch ESPN on TV.

SOUTH: Every student wakes up, has a beer for breakfast, and rushes over to where ESPN is broadcasting "Game Day Live" to get on camera and wave to the idiots up north who wonder why "Game Day Live" is never Broadcast from their campus.



Tailgating:

NORTH: Raw meat on a grill, beer with lime in it, listening to local radio station with truck tailgate down.

SOUTH: 30-foot custom pig-shaped smoker fires up at dawn. Cooking accompanied by live performance who come over during breaks and ask for a hit off bottle of bourbon.



Getting to the Stadium:

NORTH: You ask "Where's the stadium?" When you find it, you walk right in.

SOUTH: When you're near it, you'll hear it. On game day it is the state's third largest city.



Concessions:

NORTH: Drinks served in a paper cup, filled to the top with soda.

SOUTH: Drinks served in a plastic cup, with the home team's mascot on it, filled less than half way with soda, to ensure enough room for bourbon.



When National Anthem is Played:

NORTH : Stands are less than half full, and less than half of them stand up.

SOUTH: 100,000 fans, all standing, sing along in perfect four-part harmony.



The Smell in the Air After the First Score:

NORTH: Nothing changes.

SOUTH: Fireworks, Gunpowder (from the cannon in the end zone), with a touch of bourbon.



Commentary (Male):

NORTH: "Nice play."

SOUTH: " Dadgumit, you slow #$@#$* - tackle him and break his legs."



Commentary (Female):

NORTH: "My, this certainly is a violent sport."

SOUTH: " Dadgumit, you slow #$@#$* - tackle him and break his legs."



Announcers:

NORTH: Neutral and paid.

SOUTH: Announcer harmonizes with the crowd in the fight song, with a tear in his eye because he is so proud of his team.



After the Game:

NORTH: The stadium is empty way before the game ends.

SOUTH: Another rack of ribs goes on the smoker, while somebody goes to the nearest package store for more bourbon, and planning begins for next week's game.

Source unknown by me.

[Sly Fox]

I guarantee it is from a source in SE/ACC country since they think football beyond its realm is small and pointless.

Yankees invented and refined tailgating and then Texans perfected it.

[SuperJon]

Since when is Texas not in the south?

[Schfourteenteen]

[Fumblerooskies]

Since when is Texas not in the south?

Since they declared their OWN independence as The Republic of Texas.

[ATrain]

Since when is Texas not in the south?

Apparently Sly forgets that Texas joined the South in the Civil War...maybe thats why we lost, having to stroke that huge ego all the time.

[Sly Fox]

Nobody in Texas considers this state Southern. We are Southwestern by every definition or central if you want to expand out. Do you consider Missouri to be Southern?

[FlameDad]

Yankees invented and refined tailgating and then Texans perfected it.

With the obvious exception of Penn State, which has the world's largest active alumni filling the world's largest parking lot with the world's biggest & best RV's.
More people fly their private planes into Happy Valley to attend a PSU game than attend a Liberty game.
100,000+ in the stadium and another legion of fans in the tailgate parties outside the stadium.
To summarize, the PSU game-day experience is vastly superior to any football game in TX in every way........

[RagingTireFire]

Do you consider Missouri to be Southern?

I'll be deep in the cold, cold ground before I recognize Mizzoura.

[Realist]

Oh come on, everyone knows the North is inferior in football, women, and weather. Those are just the givens.

[LUconn]

Oh come on, everyone knows the North is inferior in football, women, and weather. Those are just the givens.

We've got pretty leaves in the fall! And uh, lobsters I guess. And don't forget where you get your insurance from!

[Cider Jim]

Penn State alumni may fly in to tailgate, but Tennessee has the Volunteer Navy who come down the Tennessee River in their house boats to tailgate.

[blwall1416]

Do you consider Missouri to be Southern?

I'll be deep in the cold, cold ground before I recognize Mizzoura.

"That flag only has 49 stars."

Excellent Grandpa Simpson reference...........& one of my favorite quotes from him.

[ATrain]

Nobody in Texas considers this state Southern. We are Southwestern by every definition or central if you want to expand out. Do you consider Missouri to be Southern?

Depends...which part?

[tinytim]

Yankees invented and refined tailgating and then Texans perfected it.

With the obvious exception of Penn State, which has the world's largest active alumni filling the world's largest parking lot with the world's biggest & best RV's.
More people fly their private planes into Happy Valley to attend a PSU game than attend a Liberty game.
100,000+ in the stadium and another legion of fans in the tailgate parties outside the stadium.
To summarize, the PSU game-day experience is vastly superior to any football game in TX in every way........