A Sea Of Red

Anyone have good “Foot in the Mouth” stories?

Let’s hear a good laugh. I’ll start. It’s not that bad, but…



I buy and sell power on the phone with other power marketers. So I make this call:

AZjonz: You selling any pieces for Hour Ending 3?

Marketer (in a raspy and barely audible voice): Naw, we’re going to be flat.

AZjonz (being friendly): Hey buddy! Sounds like you’re losing your voice. You should take a cough drop!

Marketer (in a raspy and barely audible voice): No, the doctor removed half of my vocal chords and some of the wiring is messed up.

(Long uncomfortable silence)

AZjonz: So, I guess you don’t have any power?

Marketer (in a raspy and barely audible voice): Nope.

(Hang up)

Anyone else?

December 2007

Setting: Yellow Submarine

Waitress: "What would you like to drink sweetie?"

Me: "Sweet Tea"

Waitress: "I am sorry sugar we only have unsweet tea, I am the sweetest thing we have here."

(This is what she said, but that is not what I heard. I heard, "I am sorry sugar, unsweet tea is the sweetest thing we have here."

Me: With the look of Bill waking up to Hillary every morning, I responded, "Ugh, just get me water."

Her jaw dropped, and I had no clue what her problem was.....my coworkers let me know what had just happened. Needless to say I left a big tip.

Stayed after class to finish a project with a friend and when it was time to leave I asked the teacher "Are you ready for us to get out of your hair?" Of course he was totally bald.

JM, I have to assume you weren’t in the south when you ordered the tea as I believe that it would be apocalyptic for a southern restaurant to NOT have sweet tea.

AZjonz wrote:JM, I have to assume you weren’t in the south when you ordered the tea as I believe that it would be apocalyptic for a southern restaurant to NOT have sweet tea.

This was in Lynchburg

Also, many places in Texas do not have sweet tea.....Besides, sweet tea is better