A Sea Of Red

If you're not gonna use a urinal, lift up the seat when you pee. Nobody's aim is perfect, I understand. Come on folks. We're all adults here. Those of us who are unfortunate enough that they can't wait until they get home to take care of business #2 style, suffer.


Also, what's with the guy who puts his hand(s) on the wall when he pees? Is he showing off in a "look, no hands!" kind of way or is he just stretching?

LUconn wrote:If you're not gonna use a urinal, lift up the seat when you pee. Nobody's aim is perfect, I understand. Come on folks. We're all adults here. Those of us who are unfortunate enough that they can't wait until they get home to take care of business #2 style, suffer.

I suggest you hover. Any female can show you the technique.

LUconn wrote:Also, what's with the guy who puts his hand(s) on the wall when he pees? Is he showing off in a "look, no hands!" kind of way or is he just stretching?

you're watching men too closely, again.

oh come on, the guy is putting on a show practically. Everybody notices. What exactly is he doing? And why do so many people do it?

I've always wondered that. I tried doing the lean thing one time while I was in the bathroom by myself and it's just too uncomfortable, and the chances of peeing on yourself is greatly increased.


And Medic, it may be easy to hover when you're just peeing, but after eating Mexican for lunch or something like that, it's impossible to hover.

this is funny because today i walked into the bathroom near the computer lab and saw some guy leaning against the wall with his hands and I had never seen this before...maybe I am just not observant or something...I thinking, "what the freak is this guy doing"....I didn't understand....

ok if you need to hover, lift up the seat....it makes aiming a lot easier, but hard on the legs and thighs. as far as the lean...im sure at one point you had to go so bad that you were gonna bust? well it just makes the process a bit more relaxing. im not a public restroom guy, but a few weeks ago i was on the road, and not near a hotel( the cleanest public restrooms, i highly recommend it) and nature called, well i cannot sit on a public toilet and could not pull a paul finch and spread paper on the toilet so quick, so i hovered....it worked out.

see hovering is good in a pinch, pun intended, but you better be ready for the splashback consequences. That is not pleasant. It would just be so much easier if people either didn't pee in a stall or at least put the seat up.

bigsmooth wrote: well i cannot sit on a public toilet and could not pull a paul finch and spread paper on the toilet so quick, so i hovered....it worked out.

Oh, come on, Smoothie. You need to try boldly going where all men have have gone before.

Who says Liberty doesn't breed intellectual discussion?

New thread time:

SuperJon wrote:New thread time:

No kidding. We don't need this one to leak out onto the other boards.

i usually only use the hover technique at airports....don't want any of that water getting back up there....i can imagine being sick and going to the doctor and hearing..."well, i got your tests back...you appear to have a guatemalen butt slug laying eggs inside you, you didn't poop in an airport bathroom by chance did you?"

another fun thing to do when you poop in a public bathroom is (this requires that you carry around a baggy of peaunut butter whereever you go) make sure you sit next to someone who, to, is pooping....after a few minutes take out the peanut butter and wipe some of it on a piece of toilet paper....then proceed to drop on the ground, making sure it falls more into his area...say "OOPS, HEY BUDDY CAN YOU KICK THAT BACK OVER HERE?"

always a good way to make friends..

oh and on a side note....during a girls basketball game i wandered into the girls bathroom and did my duty...i couldnt' for the life of me figure out what those metal trashcans were doing on the side of the stall....

then i heard the voices....i immediately put my feet up against the stall door...i was wearing flipflops and my hairylegs were exposed......i was like "oh no....if i hear a girl fart i'm going to lose it with laughter"

i waited until i heard noone and shot out of there like a B-O-O-H only to be met at the entrance by 2 ladies...to whom i said, "oops wrong one" insinuating that i had JUST walked in and turned right around and walked out.

The funny thing is in the vinecenter you have a good view of the bathroom entrance from about 30 yds...they had to know i didn't just walk in there....

because of this tramatic event i regularly go panicky in bathroom stalls and search for urinals between the door and wall cracks of the stalls...

This thread has really made me laugh.

This thread also reminds of me of proper urinal etiquette. For example, if there are 5 urinals in the restroom and you are the first one in there, you take either the one furthest to the left or right. And if you are second, you take the opposite one. That is standard procedure. If a third person comes in, they take the middle one...You only take a spot directly next to someone if you don't have any other option...

I was at a Charleston Riverdogs game (minor league baseball) this summer, and in a restroom w/ 7 urinals, I was the second guy in...The first guy took the one all the way on the right, so I then took the one all the way to the left. I finished first and as I was leaving, another guy came in and took the one right next to the other guy (and nobody else was in there)...what a huge breach of urinal etiquette.

Most importantly---EYES STRAIGHT AHEAD at all times.

That's the most akward thing in the world when that happens.

This is turning into a "Man Law" thread on etiquite.

I got one. [Edit: OK, guys. I think we're taking this a little further than is necessary - Sly]

[Edit: All right, already. - Sly]

Man law.

A.G. wrote:This is turning into a "Man Law" thread on etiquite.

I got one. [Edit: OK, guys. I think we're taking this a little further than is necessary - Sly]

Of course we did.

I go away for the evening and you guys take it too far. Way to go.

As for what WEF was saying, I completely agree. I can't count how many times I've walked into the bathroom and the guy in there is using urinal #2 of a 3 urinal bathroom. Thanks guy. You've left me not choice. I feel like asking him, "don't you know? What were you thinking?" Alas, man law says not to talk.

wow this has really taken off, and is quite funny. i really do hate that guy who goes to the middle urinal! BTW it is all about how you squat to avoid the splash.

Man Law: NO SQUATTING. You are a MAN, dangit!

i always use the middle urinal....and i spread my feet apart to the point where i'm in the others area....and i grunt a bit...

whats also great is when you get one of those restrooms with great acoustics and you let one rip while standing at the urinal...oh man thats great...

A.G. wrote:Man Law: NO SQUATTING. You are a MAN, dangit!

i always sit to pee in the mornings....i probably shouldn't explain why here..