A Sea Of Red

We're strongly considering relocating to the Virginia Beach area, specifically Chesapeake. My wife has been incredibly homesick since the birth of our daughter last November and has been wanting to move closer to family. We don't want to move to Maryland where her family lives and I don't really want to move back to the Triad area where my family lives. I feel like this move would be a good compromise. We are also considering the Raleigh area, but we don't know anyone there and the education system in NC leaves a lot to be desired.

We spent some time in Chesapeake over the summer and liked what we saw of the area. It's 3 hours from her parents and 4 hours from mine. Our best friends live there and like the area. We're both special education teachers so finding jobs shouldn't be tough.

Pros:
Proximity to family. It's close to the beach. The education system in Virginia is much better than the one in North Carolina. Our friend's mom would watch our daughter for less than what we're currently paying for in-home daycare. There is a burgeoning craft beer scene in the area.

Cons: No real familiarity with the area. Relocating sucks. Starting new jobs sucks.

After a lot of protesting, I've finally come around on this. I proposed the possibility of this move to my wife last night and she literally jumped with joy. I think this may be the best thing we can do at this point. We'll probably put our home on the market after Thanksgiving when the snowbirds arrive so we maximize the number potential buyers. Feel free to weigh in.

If mama ain't happy, ain't nobody happy. At least that was the expression my grandparents shared with me back when dinosaurs still roamed among us.

And having just moved this weekend, the experience of relocation was even more awful than I remembered.

Sly Fox wrote:If mama ain't happy, ain't nobody happy. At least that was the expression my grandparents shared with me back when dinosaurs still roamed among us.

And having just moved this weekend, the experience of relocation was even more awful than I remembered.

This is 100% true. For the first few months it was almost daily crying. It's past that point now, but I can just sense that she's not truly happy here anymore. She's only staying here because I like it and that doesn't seem to be entirely fair.

We are three months in to the having a baby with no family around situation. My wife isn't where yours is (yet) but it's definitely tough. I offer nothing to the conversation other than being in a similar situation.

Relocating can be an adventure sometimes. My only advice is this. If you find a private school that comes with a tuition scholarship to a neighboring university, don't take advantage of it. That doesn't work out sometimes.

Virginia Beach is somewhere I'd consider moving. I have a cousin who lives there, husband owns a boating business, and they seem to love it. I'm sure Atrain can give you the lowdown, having actually lived there for a bit.

Sly Fox wrote:If mama ain't happy, ain't nobody happy.

This.

You and ATrain can be neighbors when they move back!

I would move back to Virginia Beach if I could (well, I can still, but $76K/year w/ no state income tax is greater than $46k/year w/ a state income tax, in addition fed benefits > state benefits). Chesapeake is a great suburban area, just try to avoid bridges, tunnels and especially bridge-tunnels on the commute to/from work (when I moved there, I was told to live on the side of the water you work on - trust me, that is the top advice that can be given to anyone who moves there).

The other thing is, depending on where in MD her family lives, you can avoid I-95 if you take the Chesapeake Bay Bridge-Tunnel. That $15/one way toll is worth avoiding the massive parking lot between Richmond and DC.

Praying for you as y'all consider this move.

Purple Haize wrote:You and ATrain can be neighbors when they move back!

We could have our own FF neighborhood with 01LUGrad also living there.

Out friends in Chesapeake are both LU students grads.

Sounds perfect to me. Close enough to visit but far enough away not to just drop by out of the blue.

I miss Florida a ton though and can't fathom wanting out but I see where your wife is coming from.

Fort Myers has Skyline Chili. That alone would keep me there.

thepostman wrote:Sounds perfect to me. Close enough to visit but far enough away not to just drop by out of the blue.

I miss Florida a ton though and can't fathom wanting out but I see where your wife is coming from.

The distance is perfect for me. I kind of feel trapped when I'm too close and expected to show up for every little thing. I'm sure I'll miss Florida, but I don't want to be selfish.

Sly Fox wrote:Fort Myers has Skyline Chili. That alone would keep me there.

I've still never tried it. I need to go by there one of these days.

Curious, did you consider the Lynchburg area?

Both my wife and I were born and raised in Chesapeake VA. Both of our parents live there and we recently considered a move back to the area when I received a pretty decent job offer in Norfolk. We ended up staying here in Lynchburg for now. Anyways, I went to both private and public schools out there... finished up at Hickory. If you have any specific questions about places or things feel free to ask or PM me.

LUDad wrote:Curious, did you consider the Lynchburg area?

No. We've lived in Lynchburg twice and have no desire to move back there.

Humble_Opinion wrote:Both my wife and I were born and raised in Chesapeake VA. Both of our parents live there and we recently considered a move back to the area when I received a pretty decent job offer in Norfolk. We ended up staying here in Lynchburg for now. Anyways, I went to both private and public schools out there... finished up at Hickory. If you have any specific questions about places or things feel free to ask or PM me.

Thanks. I may take you up on that if we decide to move forward with this plan.

I should be surprised that my name hasn't come up in a discussion re: the 757 (even though I lived almost my whole life there), but I stopped being surprised by a lot of things a few years ago.

You'll enjoy either chesapeake or Virginia Beach. both have good schools (public and private), good shopping, entertainment for the kids in VB as well as..well...the beach of course, lots of good eating in both areas, plenty of excellent job and housing options and you can hop on 64 and head in either direction to see family (and the CBBT as Atrain mentioned).

BJWilliams wrote:I should be surprised that my name hasn't come up in a discussion re: the 757 (even though I lived almost my whole life there), but I stopped being surprised by a lot of things a few years ago.

You'll enjoy either chesapeake or Virginia Beach. both have good schools (public and private), good shopping, entertainment for the kids in VB as well as..well...the beach of course, lots of good eating in both areas, plenty of excellent job and housing options and you can hop on 64 and head in either direction to see family (and the CBBT as Atrain mentioned).

BJ - it is a world of difference between Chesapeake/VB and Portsmouth.

I'd normally avoid 64 and take 460 to head west. You have more stoplights and small towns (although you also have the Virginia Diner), but you're not sitting/crawling at the HRBT, Fort Eustis, Busch Gardens and then fighting heavy traffic all the way to Richmond.

I'm glad BYD likes the RVA area, but for me its not contest: the 757 wins.

adam42381 wrote:

LUDad wrote:Curious, did you consider the Lynchburg area?

No. We've lived in Lynchburg twice and have no desire to move back there.

Reason I asked is because I am in the reverse situation. I live in Charlotte and am about 4 years from retirement. I have two daughters who when to Liberty and stayed in Lynchburg when they finished school. One recently married a LU grad whose parents live in town.The other is marrying a guy later this month whose family also lives in Lynchburg. I don't see them moving back and my wife is already mourning the fact that the inlaws will be helping with the grandkids and she will be left out. What is a guy to do? Looks like a move to or around the Lynchburg area is in my future.

I am seeing more grandparents moving to get closer to the grandkids than vice versa. I bet if you hold out that could happen in your case unless your parents are too far away from retirement age.

Interesting discussion, LUDad. We fall in the opposite category. 13 years ago, we moved from a place we loved in Austin to Houston so that we could raise our kids around both sets of grandparents. And one of the primary reasons that I stepped away from my career in sportscasting was that it was trying to push me away from family in Houston. I have not regretted walking away from TV one day since.

Just this weekend, we moved nearly an hour out into the country to a lake community after spending eight months recognizing what life was like without the free, quality childcare that comes from Nana & Grandpa. My commute is now much longer and I am surrounded by silver-haired golf cart drivers trying not to be late to their tee times. But it is ultimately worth the sacrifices.

Did you just say it was a sacrifice to move to a lake community?

LUDad wrote:

adam42381 wrote:

LUDad wrote:Curious, did you consider the Lynchburg area?

No. We've lived in Lynchburg twice and have no desire to move back there.

Reason I asked is because I am in the reverse situation. I live in Charlotte and am about 4 years from retirement. I have two daughters who when to Liberty and stayed in Lynchburg when they finished school. One recently married a LU grad whose parents live in town.The other is marrying a guy later this month whose family also lives in Lynchburg. I don't see them moving back and my wife is already mourning the fact that the inlaws will be helping with the grandkids and she will be left out. What is a guy to do? Looks like a move to or around the Lynchburg area is in my future.

I am seeing more grandparents moving to get closer to the grandkids than vice versa. I bet if you hold out that could happen in your case unless your parents are too far away from retirement age.

We both went to LU and lived there up until the time we got married. We moved back to Lynchburg a year and a half after we were married and stayed for a year before realizing that it just wasn't the place for us. Both of our parents are basically retired at this point, but neither side has any desire to live in Florida. We thought that might be an option, but they quickly let us know that it wasn't happening.

My parents travel quite a bit between their primary home in the Triad and their places in N. Myrtle Beach and Beech Mountain, NC. Her parents own a large farm in Northern Neck, VA in addition to their home in southern MD. They travel pretty extensively as well, so buying a place in FL just isn't feasible.