A Sea Of Red

I realize I don't know most of you except by screen name, but I figure we're all kind of an extended family around here, so I'd like to just pour this stuff out, no matter how it looks. Hope that's ok.

I really need some prayer for my fiancee. We've been together for a little more than four years, engaged for a little more than 1. After about a year, she confesses to me that she struggles with depression. She's been receiving treatment for it, but every now and then, she gets in a funk for awhile, and it just takes her some time to get out of it.

Back in October, I started my current job, which requires me to travel quite extensively. (Writing this from a hotel room in DC, no less). 2 weeks, after I start, she lost her job..partly due, to her depression. She had been calling out of work when I was away, because she was lonely and depressed. Her work got tired of it, so when the next round of layoffs came, she got the ax. Since then, she's been unemployed, uninspired to find a new job, and I can't take it anymore. The problem is..I still love her. She's a great person when she's healthy. Recently, she has (finally) been looking for a new job, but even now, it's only with temp agencies. She can't seem to commit to a position, or give 100% to it.

It has put a strain on my relationships to my family, my friends, and with each other. If I could find the proper words, I probably would have broken it off a few months ago. How do you do something like this and not feel like the most insensitive person alive?

I'd just like you to lift this situation up with God in your prayers. I certainly don't have the answers, but I can't take things the way they are anymore. Having only one income has wiped out my savings, we're running on empty financially and emotionally, and I need a change. Whether that is with her in my life still or without her, I need to know where to go and what to say.

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Sorry for rambling..I feel like I just needed to get that out with people who come from the same religious background as I do. Thanks for listening.

I know how it feels when you feel like you need to break off a relationship and one side of you says don't and the other says go. All I can tell you is pray hard about it, and think about deep down inside what you really want. If you can't see yourself living with her the rest of your life, then you may as well break it off because you sure don't want to get married.

very tough bro.

Definitely something to pray about- I have been in this EXACT situation.

seems like you really care about her. The only thing you can really do is make sure she knows that- but that its unhealthy for you to be there in this situation, and its DEFINITELY not good for her either.

And as hard as it is to do- sometimes you've gotta walk away. Will definitely remember you and this situation.

I cant offer you advice, simply bc I am not mature or wise enough to lead you in a direction, but I will definitely be lifting you up.

Praying for you. If you think this is hard now just wait until you get married, and you don't want to go thru a divorce or bring kids into this world under the present situation.
I had a girlfriend who suffers depression, her problem is she would stop taking her medicine and change overnight. In our situation I could not help her or bring her up, instead she would drag me down.
Life is too short, so pray that God will direct you and if she is not the one, pray He will send you the mate he wants you to have

Depression is serious business and your fiance certainly has my prayers for her healing.

I'll also lift you up in prayer for wisdom in handling the situation. I can imagine how painful it must be.

agreed with sly about the seriousness of depression. i will certainly be praying for you and her as you go through this.

I'll be praying for you.

While she may be getting treatment, if she is experiencing these symptoms, it may not be the right treatment. There are now dozens of antidepressants available, and sometimes it is necessary to try a few before you hit on the one which works for you. She definately should see a professional ASAP to look at a change of medication or dosage. In addition, if she is unable to maintain employment at this time, having nothing to do is the worst possible thing for her. There are programs where she can be engaged in meaningful activity while regaining her confidence and transition back to work. PM me if you want more info.

Praying for her, you, and your relationship.

Still praying for you in this matter... I know this has been weighing on your mind for a while... It can definitely be a hard thing.