Our Christian foundation is what makes our university unique. This is the place to bring prayer requests, discuss theological issues and how to become better Champions for Christ.

Moderators: jcmanson, Sly Fox, BuryYourDuke

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By thepostman
Registration Days Posts
#456328
Confronting anybody on their sin on a public message board is never the right move. We must confront them one on one and if that doesn't accomplish anything then talk to them in a group setting with other loving, mature Christians. Confronting sin in any other way is not beneficial to anybody. Just my 2 cents.

So marriage counseling......
By ALUmnus
Registration Days Posts
#456329
VAgolf: Hey guys, getting some weird and concerning pre-marital counseling from my pastor. Any advice?
Atrain: Well I lived with my partner first. Not for everyone, but worked great for us!
Me: (waving my hands frantically) Do not do this, terrible advice! This is sinful and not something a Christian would choose to do. As a Christian you should in no way follow this path.

So, this now has been called: sanctimonious, judgmental, ostracizing, arrogant, DBery, making assumptions, belittling, unloving, talking down to everyone, etc, etc.

I’m really trying hard to figure out what’s going on here. Is there anything untrue about my original post? Are you guys listening to the inspired Word of God, or are you listening to the world? This is really a disturbing trend from Christian college graduates.
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By BJWilliams
Registration Days Posts
#456330
I think the point is that this is not supposed to be a (or rather yet another) topic on homosexuality (which I have always disagreed with), but a legitimate topic where Sweat is seeking good informational sources top help him and his bride to be prepare for the adventure they are about to go on.
By flamehunter
Registration Days Posts
#456331
Best pre-marriage advice I got - "She is always right". Whether she is or not, it never hurts to let her think she is. Bottom line is, you both need to put the other ahead of yourself, and God before them. It is a constant struggle but, as Christians, we should already be familiar with putting ourselves second at least.
By LUconn
Registration Days Posts
#456332
Purple Haize wrote:I'm pretty sure ATrain knows how most of us feel.
Atrain has been publicly out on here for many years and I can honestly say that I dont know how most of you feel about it. I'm in awe of the support or deafening silence his gay posts receive on this message board.

And then someone does speak up and medic is their to shout them down. Dont forget to ad the +1 adam! I would say if you took it on a post by post basis, this board is actually overwhelmingly supportive of homosexuality.




If you have a problem with this conversation, BJ, please take it to PMs.
User avatar
By adam42381
Registration Days Posts
#456333
I will publicly state that I have no problem whatsoever with anything consenting adults choose to do behind closed doors. If it isn't hurting those involved or anyone else, it's not my business. I seriously doubt that most other posters here agree with me.
User avatar
By adam42381
Registration Days Posts
#456335
I think personal freedom is a good thing no matter what someone's religious affiliation may be. I am not here to judge anyone for the choices they make as long as they are not harming themselves or others.
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By Cider Jim
Registration Days Posts
#456336
flamehunter wrote:Best pre-marriage advice I got - "She is always right". Whether she is or not, it never hurts to let her think she is.
"Hen-pecked" Rip Van Winkle would likely just shrug his shoulders and go to sleep for 20 years after hearing that advice.
:boring
By SuperJon
Registration Days Posts
#456338
My biggest problem was the way the post from ALUmnus was crafted. I completely disagree with non-married people of opposite sexes living together. I also believe that same sex actions are completely and 100% sin. Instead of simply calling it wrong, he made it sound that someone that is a Christian would never live together before marriage or that you can't be a Christian if you choose to live together before marriage. While I think it's not right and definitely not smart, I can't say that someone isn't a Christian or can't be a Christian if they do that.
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By Purple Haize
Registration Days Posts
#456349
SuperJon wrote:My biggest problem was the way the post from ALUmnus was crafted. I completely disagree with non-married people of opposite sexes living together. I also believe that same sex actions are completely and 100% sin. Instead of simply calling it wrong, he made it sound that someone that is a Christian would never live together before marriage or that you can't be a Christian if you choose to live together before marriage. While I think it's not right and definitely not smart, I can't say that someone isn't a Christian or can't be a Christian if they do that.
....and we have a winner.

Yet no one is answering JK's question. I think it could be well argued that The Bible says the person we have sex with is who we are married to. That may or may not involve the person you are living with. Conversely you can live with someone and not have sex with them.
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By Purple Haize
Registration Days Posts
#456350
LUconn wrote:
Purple Haize wrote:I'm pretty sure ATrain knows how most of us feel.
Atrain has been publicly out on here for many years and I can honestly say that I dont know how most of you feel about it. I'm in awe of the support or deafening silence his gay posts receive on this message board.
ATrain wrote:To confirm PH, I do know how the vast majority of the board feels about homosexuality.
Peace out
He does.
flamehunter wrote:Best pre-marriage advice I got - "She is always right". Whether she is or not, it never hurts to let her think she is.
Amen!
By SuperJon
Registration Days Posts
#456357
I think it's pretty clear that marriage starts with a religious ceremony. If you look at context in the Bible, especially Song of Solomon, you see that the marriage starts with the ceremony and that the consummation of the marriage is after the ceremony.
By SuperJon
Registration Days Posts
#456358
Purple Haize wrote:Conversely you can live with someone and not have sex with them.
It's not about whether it's right or wrong to live with someone of the opposite sex, especially if you're dating/engaged. It's about if it's wise or not. One of the most impactful verses of the entire Bible to my life has been Ephesians 5:15 where it says to be careful how you live and make sure you are being wise, not unwise. It doesn't say be right. You can do everything "right" and still be one step away from doing something completely stupid.
By Yacht Rock
Registration Days Posts
#456360
My wife and I had counseling before we were married. The pastor discussed some of the logistical challenges of marriage which was good. I think too many times people look at the marriage ceremony and union as something to be purchased. Our pastor really wanted to know about our relationship to see if it is something that our church could endorse. I would hope that some people go through counseling, and realize that they are getting married for the wrong reasons and maybe don't get married and wait until they understand what they are doing. If I were a pastor, I wouldn't want to marry anyone who paid me or asked me. I would want to ensure that, from a spiritual perspective, this was something I felt was God-blessed.

As far as the other debate that has hijacked the thread, lol, it's always wise to not live together before you get married. Doing so is a bad idea. Even if we feel that there were benefits. There might be earthly benefits to a lot of things that aren't a good idea. Aside from many other reasons, as humans with desires, it would be difficult for two people to live together and have romantic feelings for each other and remain celibate.

I'll put it this way. If someone struggles with getting drunk, then they probably should refrain from hanging out in a bar. God has built in a desire for sex among all of us because, in the right circumstance, it is God blessed. Obviously in the wrong circumstance, it isn't blessed and not only is a spiritual sin but can have physical consequences as well. Since this is a desire innate in the human condition, it is extremely unwise to tempt yourself.

Overall, anytime we try to redefine God's designs for relationships based on our own human desires, we're likely going down the wrong road. That includes homosexuality, pre-marital sex, etc.
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By Kolzilla41
Registration Days Posts
#456363
SuperJon wrote:My biggest problem was the way the post from ALUmnus was crafted. I completely disagree with non-married people of opposite sexes living together. I also believe that same sex actions are completely and 100% sin. Instead of simply calling it wrong, he made it sound that someone that is a Christian would never live together before marriage or that you can't be a Christian if you choose to live together before marriage. While I think it's not right and definitely not smart, I can't say that someone isn't a Christian or can't be a Christian if they do that.
I can agree with this.
User avatar
By BJWilliams
Registration Days Posts
#456364
flamerbob wrote:
SuperJon wrote:My biggest problem was the way the post from ALUmnus was crafted. I completely disagree with non-married people of opposite sexes living together. I also believe that same sex actions are completely and 100% sin. Instead of simply calling it wrong, he made it sound that someone that is a Christian would never live together before marriage or that you can't be a Christian if you choose to live together before marriage. While I think it's not right and definitely not smart, I can't say that someone isn't a Christian or can't be a Christian if they do that.
I can agree with this.
As can I
User avatar
By Purple Haize
Registration Days Posts
#456366
BJWilliams wrote:
flamerbob wrote:
SuperJon wrote:My biggest problem was the way the post from ALUmnus was crafted. I completely disagree with non-married people of opposite sexes living together. I also believe that same sex actions are completely and 100% sin. Instead of simply calling it wrong, he made it sound that someone that is a Christian would never live together before marriage or that you can't be a Christian if you choose to live together before marriage. While I think it's not right and definitely not smart, I can't say that someone isn't a Christian or can't be a Christian if they do that.
I can agree with this.
As can I
Way to go FB! Points on the board!
:checkeredflag :cheerleader :pbjtime :cheerleader
User avatar
By BJWilliams
Registration Days Posts
#456373
Purple Haize wrote:
BJWilliams wrote:I do...they aren't 100% foolproof though...even you know that
99.9% is a pretty solid percentage.
I've seen variances between 95 and 99, but point is, it can happen. remember, we are fallible sinful human beings. we forget things, and we make mistakes
User avatar
By Purple Haize
Registration Days Posts
#456375
BJWilliams wrote:
Purple Haize wrote:
BJWilliams wrote:I do...they aren't 100% foolproof though...even you know that
99.9% is a pretty solid percentage.
I've seen variances between 95 and 99, but point is, it can happen. remember, we are fallible sinful human beings. we forget things, and we make mistakes
This will help your understanding about how to avoid pregnancy. You are also the one who equated living together with having a child. There are many married couples who don't get pregnant, and you would assume they live together. In fact, there are far more pregnancies involving un married people NOT living together than living together. So to insinuate that living together will end in pregnancy is very inaccurate

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